Out of Control: Why Disciplining Your Child Doesn't Work and What Will
ISBN: 1897238762
EAN13: 9781897238769
Language: English
Pages: 248
Dimensions: 1.00" H x 9.00" L x 6.00" W
Weight: 1.00 lbs.
Format: Paperback
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Book Overview
Every parent wants the golden key to raising well-behaved, academically gifted, successful, happy children. Embedded in the collective psyche is the notion that discipline is the cornerstone to achieving these goals. Out of Control offers a never-before-published perspective on why the entire premise of discipline is flawed. Dr. Shefali Tsabary reveals how discipline is a major cause of generations of dysfunction. The author goes to the heart of the problems parents have with children, challenging society s dependence on discipline, daring readers to let go of fear-based ideologies and replace them with an approach that draws parent and child together. The key is ongoing meaningful connection between parent and child, free from threats, deprivation, punishment, and timeouts all forms of manipulation. Parents learn how to enter into deep communion with their children, understanding the reasons for a behavior and how to bring out the best in the child. Far from a laissez-faire, anything goes, approach, this is how a child learns responsibility and takes ownership of their life, equipped with character and resilience that flow naturally from within.
Editor Reviews
From the Back Cover Where did the belief come from that we need to discipline our children if they are to grow up into individuals who are well adjusted and who make something of their lives? Out of Control reveals how the very discipline we impose to control behavior is in reality a major cause of bad behavior, disrespect for adults, and dysfunction such as bullying, hostility toward family and society, drugs, alcoholism, and teen suicide. Dr Tsabary asserts that to parent effectively requires us to develop a deep connection with our children, so that we address the feelings that drive a child's behavior instead of punishing. When we tackle the reason for the behavior, says Dr Tsabary, it automatically changes. Far from a laissez-faire, anything goes approach, Dr Tsabary advocates for a high level of parental resolve that majors not in control, but in helping a child develop a sense of personal responsibility. Authentic connection, in which children can be real with their parents, leads to a home in which self-discipline prevails-- both for the child and the parent. The need to impose our will on our children evaporates, leading to respect, ownership of one's life, and a strong character marked by a resilience that flows naturally from within.
From the front Cover Where did the belief come from that we need to discipline our children if they are to grow up into individuals who are well adjusted and who make something of their lives? Out of Control reveals how the very discipline we impose to control behavior is in reality a major cause of bad behavior, disrespect for adults, and dysfunction such as bullying, hostility toward family and society, drugs, alcoholism, and teen suicide. Dr Tsabary asserts that to parent effectively requires us to develop a deep connection with our children, so that we address the feelings that drive a child's behavior instead of punishing. When we tackle the reason for the behavior, says Dr Tsabary, it automatically changes. Far from a laissez-faire, anything goes approach, Dr Tsabary advocates for a high level of parental resolve that majors not in control, but in helping a child develop a sense of personal responsibility. Authentic connection, in which children can be real with their parents, leads to a home in which self-discipline prevails-- both for the child and the parent. The need to impose our will on our children evaporates, leading to respect, ownership of one's life, and a strong character marked by a resilience that flows naturally from within.