Why Does He Do That?: Inside The Minds Of Angry And Controlling Men
ISBN: 0425191656
EAN13: 9780425191651
Language: English
Release Date: Sep 2, 2003
Pages: 432
Dimensions: 1.02" H x 8.98" L x 5.98" W
Weight: 0.88 lbs.
Format: Paperback
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Book Overview

In this groundbreaking bestseller, Lundy Bancroft--a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men--uses his knowledge about how abusers think to help women recognize when they are being controlled or devalued in a relationship, and to find ways to get free of abuse.

He says he loves you. So.why does he do that?

You've asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men--and change your life. In Why Does He Do That? you will learn about:

- The early warning signs of abuse
- The nature of abusive thinking
- Myths about abusers
- Ten abusive personality types
- The role of drugs and alcohol
- What you can fix, and what you can't
- And how to get out of an abusive relationship safely

This is without a doubt the most informative and useful book yet written on the subject of abusive men. Women who are armed with the insights found in these pages will be on the road to recovering control of their lives.--Jay G. Silverman, Ph.D., Director, Violence Prevention Programs, Harvard School of Public Health

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Book Reviews (9)

  |   9  reviews
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   Best book I've read on abusive, controlling men.
I've been out of a psychologically abusive relationship with a narcissist for just over a year and have read dozens of books about how to recover from the damage of abuse, but this is the most complete description of the behavior I experienced. He is responsible for his behavior and I am responsible for it. He feels entitled to control my life, my sexuality, my career goals, and my self esteem because of his anger and blaming. His contempt for women is the problem, and all my attempts to compromise and give more only enforced his delusion. No other book made it clear. My kids are living a life free of abuse.
   It's not your fault
The book will no longer make you feel sorry for your abuser. It will help you hope that one day he will be accountable.
   Must Read
Excellent book. Excellent help! The first book the National Domestic Abuse Hotline recommended was this one. I'm sure I'm a friend. That's what I called for. I was able to summarize the book for my pastor and hopefully he will use it to help church members caught in domestic abuse situations.
   Excellent information
This book was extremely informative and helped me better understand my experiences in a controlling relationship.
   Great Information
Really helped me understand the why behind his terrible behavior and how I can be less triggered
   This book has saved my life.
There is no explanation for the psychology genius behind these pages. This book has changed my life. I bought copies for my mother who was abused by my father and my friend who is in a domestic violence situation.
Over the course of my life, I've had this book recommended to me about 3 or 4 times, but never got around to reading it. 3 years after getting out of an abusive relationship, I decided to try it. It was an amazing read. More of my last relationship makes sense to me now and I feel better about it. It has been implied that it was my fault many times. I'm happy to have these resources in order to help me and my friends stay safe from abuse in the future. The writing was well done and kept me engaged throughout the book. It was well structured.
   All therapists should read this book
Three different therapists worked on active listening and communication exercises for me and my abusive husband. I gave the last one a copy of the book I bought on Amazon for him because he didn't understand what I was going through. If you are a marriage counselor, a therapist, or a spouse who is made to feel crazy, please read this book. It would be great if it were required for all therapist certification programs. Communication skill training is useless if you don't understand the inner workings of what you're doing. If you only buy one book, it should be this one.
   Eye-Opening and Heartbreaking But Much Needed
I needed this book and it was very difficult for me to read. I had to deal with the emotions I was feeling before I picked it up again. I recommend it to any woman who feels like she is being abused. About a month before I heard about this book, I separated from my ex. I left because I no longer felt safe at home. I was confused about whether or not what I was experiencing was abuse. Don't wait to read the book, listen to your heart and get out before things get worse.